My parents were trying to guilt me the last few years that it will be my responsibility to look after them when the time comes that they need a caregiver.
I told them they could live with me if they are independent, but if they need professional care, then we would move them where they need to be for that, like a retirement home.
My parents were both offended by this clearly, but I saw what happened when my parents tried to be the caregiver to my grandfather when he got very old and it nearly tore our family apart basically having to have shifts to go and take care of him all so he could sit in a chair in his house. It sacraficed years of our lives and I delayed going to college for several years because of it. Family members are not professional caregivers and trying to be results in bad care and delays the inevitable of needing to go to a home.
Despite explaining all of this to them and them knowing how hard it was taking care of an elderly parent, they still feel like I have to do it. I asked them, “Did you only have kids to make sure someone will look after you when you are old,” and they get all flustered by that and never give a straight answer.
They have given up on me now and are currently guilting my siblings to look after them some day.
Thank fuck my grandparents were completely independent until they got very sick very quickly and died.
Two of my grandparents passed before I was born, of rather aggressive cancer. The other two lived completely independently until age-related illnesses got them in a matter of weeks.
I kinda hope that’s what happens to my parents; they’re in their mid 70s now and doing just fine on their own. My sister and I only need to help with with the occasional thing, like fixing stuff around the house that takes a decent amount of strength to do, or climbing ladders.
My parents were the exact opposite. My mom constantly reminded us how difficult it was to care for her mom and my dad’s father after they got sick. My dad was the same. Then my mom passed away early and suddenly. Now my dad is that fucking guy too. My sister and I will have none of it however. Mom taught us well.
My parents were trying to guilt me the last few years that it will be my responsibility to look after them when the time comes that they need a caregiver.
I told them they could live with me if they are independent, but if they need professional care, then we would move them where they need to be for that, like a retirement home.
My parents were both offended by this clearly, but I saw what happened when my parents tried to be the caregiver to my grandfather when he got very old and it nearly tore our family apart basically having to have shifts to go and take care of him all so he could sit in a chair in his house. It sacraficed years of our lives and I delayed going to college for several years because of it. Family members are not professional caregivers and trying to be results in bad care and delays the inevitable of needing to go to a home.
Despite explaining all of this to them and them knowing how hard it was taking care of an elderly parent, they still feel like I have to do it. I asked them, “Did you only have kids to make sure someone will look after you when you are old,” and they get all flustered by that and never give a straight answer.
They have given up on me now and are currently guilting my siblings to look after them some day.
Thank fuck my grandparents were completely independent until they got very sick very quickly and died.
Two of my grandparents passed before I was born, of rather aggressive cancer. The other two lived completely independently until age-related illnesses got them in a matter of weeks.
I kinda hope that’s what happens to my parents; they’re in their mid 70s now and doing just fine on their own. My sister and I only need to help with with the occasional thing, like fixing stuff around the house that takes a decent amount of strength to do, or climbing ladders.
My parents were the exact opposite. My mom constantly reminded us how difficult it was to care for her mom and my dad’s father after they got sick. My dad was the same. Then my mom passed away early and suddenly. Now my dad is that fucking guy too. My sister and I will have none of it however. Mom taught us well.